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Widen the Net of the Flesh
Note: This is an essay originally sent to subscribers on my mailing list, where I send essays every 1-2 months. If you would like to...
Aug 26, 202312 min read
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On bodies, souls, and indigenous ontologies
Note: this is not a full essay, but a segment taken from a longer piece sent to subscribers. If you want to receive essays in your inbox...
Aug 7, 20237 min read
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Great are the Multitudes
Note: This is an essay originally sent to subscribers on my mailing list, where I send essays every 1-2 months. If you would like to...
Jun 28, 202314 min read
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Nowhere But Here
There is no ideal life. There is only the life that you have chosen freely. Sometimes, a line arrives fully formed in my life, like a...
Jan 14, 202312 min read
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What is a god?
Note: This post consists of a few excerpts from Ousia, a book that I am currently writing. These sections are not finished, but I felt...
Oct 14, 20227 min read
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How Many Ways to Pray (whether or not you believe in God)
Let us begin with a clarification: the existence of God is beside the point. The fact that we can question God's existence as external...
Oct 3, 20223 min read
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Art is useless...unless it makes you an artist
I have long believed that my work is useless. Useless unless its beauty crawls beneath your own sight, hatching new seeds of seeing....
Sep 5, 20222 min read
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The Weight of Material Things
Sun clutters the floor. Still, no words. My objects have not yet bent their bodies to the shape of this new space. Opened boxes, my...
Sep 4, 20228 min read
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Bodies & Lost Localities
The hand of summer has felled interior wanderings. The whoosh of cars and the buzz of lawnmowers sound thickly through a viscous heat....
Jul 24, 202217 min read
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The Ghost of the Female Body
(This is an excerpt from my memoir, The Sea Once Swallowed Me). The earth wakes stark with white light, the air tastes of iron. As I...
Jul 17, 20223 min read
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Time is a Hiding Place
Evening, the sun still un-setted. Light shatters through the outside trees, breaking through windows and landing on my typing hands....
Jun 17, 202210 min read
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A Forgotten Belonging
There is a profound alienation at the heart of the modern self: we move through seas of strangers, we feel trapped between the cramped...
Apr 22, 20221 min read
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In Praise of Shadows (On the Precipice of Light)
Note: This essay was originally written for my email subscribers. If you struggle (as I do) with reading very long essays on the...
Mar 22, 202218 min read
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The Weight of Selfhood
"Spacetime is the individuation of entities." —Schopenhauer Blinking into self-consciousness, you are birthed into a terrible weight. You...
Feb 4, 20224 min read
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Language, Being, and the Sea Beneath
A truth is found in fragments, scattered throughout all disciplines. Each thinker employs a distinct language, but the essence is the...
Jan 27, 20224 min read
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Excerpts from Wakings: Performance Poems to Awaken the Body and Transform the Earth
These are early excerpts from a book that's been gestating for about three years now. If you'd like to receive more early excerpts...
Dec 24, 20213 min read
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Bake a Loaf of Bread, Craft a New Mythology
Note: This is an excerpt from my next book, Ousia: Performance Poems for New World-ing. There are symbols in the original book that...
Nov 25, 20214 min read
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Love Widens The Horizon of Possibility
Dear Readers, What’s distracting her? I’m not sure; my eyes are fixed on her child. He is maybe a year old, wearing only a diaper—with no...
Nov 15, 20215 min read
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The Iconic Nature of Love
Dear Readers, From cold air and brightly-colored trees to a perfect 70 something degrees and stunning sunsets: we are back in Arizona to...
Oct 25, 20216 min read
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Love De-objectifies
(This and the next three posts are from a three-part email series about the workings of love. I rarely post emails to my website, but if...
Oct 24, 20214 min read
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Netflix's "Cuties" Is The Film We Deserve
"My aesthetic perspective is to hold a mirror in front of the world so that we as adults are able to see what we have created." -Maïmouna...
Dec 26, 20207 min read
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Day 100
This morning when I opened the blinds, the sun was of a different quality. This is summer sun, I thought, or at least the sun of middle...
Apr 2, 20205 min read
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Day 99
Once upon a time, there was a garden. And a woman and a man walked in the cool of noon and were unafraid. Things changed. We began to...
Mar 29, 20202 min read
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Day 98
We are too big in our brains, too little in our bodies. This is what I tell myself, at least, when Georg takes Sophie on a hike so I can...
Mar 28, 20202 min read
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Day 97
Our mythology sinks deep. It is whispered through us since birth, the axioms of our doctrine. "Blessed are the wealthy," they whisper,...
Mar 26, 20202 min read
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Day 96
It is so much easier to write about the frustration than the joy. I have expressed dissatisfaction with staying home all day (my life for...
Mar 25, 20202 min read
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Day 95
It seems unreasonable to claim that any of us could be responsible for the actions of a stranger. But I am beginning to believe that...
Mar 24, 20203 min read
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Day 94
It appears that our neighbor has committed suicide. It appears that my love wasn't enough to save him. Or rather, it appears that I...
Mar 22, 20202 min read
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Day 93
I speak from hypocrisy, as we all must speak. Georg is listless and depressed at the end of each day working from home. Last night, he...
Mar 21, 20202 min read
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Day 92
Here are detailed instructions from an ancient letter, on how to turn copper into gold: Step 1: Take 9 chicken eggs Step 2: Place them in...
Mar 21, 20203 min read
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Day 91
The cool silence of a morning with the blinds pulled shut. Hearing the rain on the windows behind, while Sophie breastfeeds on the couch....
Mar 18, 20202 min read
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Day 90
Over the weekend we ate pandemic pizza, quarantine cookies. If it's alliteration, it feels justified. But today is Tuesday, the beginning...
Mar 18, 20202 min read
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Day 89
People in desperation will always welcome tragedy with a strange intermingling of relief. I can't quite explain it, but I think it has...
Mar 16, 20201 min read
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Day 88
Today a friend called me, then texted. I was away from my phone, chasing Sophie through the sun-lit grass while other moms chatted and...
Mar 12, 20202 min read
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Day 87
Morality is taking personal responsibility for the wrongness of all things. This seems impossible. This requires caring, and we think we...
Mar 11, 20202 min read
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Day 86
I had the strangest thought today while taking out the trash. It was in answer to a question which isn't so strange during this season....
Mar 11, 20202 min read
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Day 85
What I didn't mention is that we spent all weekend looking to buy a condo. Utah is expensive, especially near Salt Lake, which is where...
Mar 10, 20201 min read
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Day 84
As we age, we become reconciled to the earth. No. But that’s the idea anyway. Reconciliation. It’s why we breathe to begin with, you...
Mar 9, 20202 min read
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Day 83
The light came through the glass door this evening while I drank peppermint tea. Sophie tried begging for cartoons, but I insisted on...
Mar 6, 20202 min read
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Day 81
To track the living, dying light. This is essential to me. And I'm not sure what it means (I'm not sure what anything important means). I...
Mar 4, 20201 min read
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Day 80
You can only love someone whom you do not need. How is this possible? We must fill the crater-sized hole inside us with something other...
Mar 3, 20201 min read
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Day 79
We aren't taking Sophie (to Costa Rica). She is almost two years old, but it still feels like abandonment. When I booked the flights, I...
Mar 2, 20202 min read
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Day 78
I am trying to hide from myself. That's my excuse. Good days and bad days this winter; lately, the days have been bad. I have no desire...
Feb 26, 20202 min read
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Day 77
The broiled red peppers inside, the breaking light outside. Cold. And God in everything: the feeling of something sacred stalking me. The...
Feb 20, 20201 min read
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Day 76
Joan Miro: I can't stop thinking about him, the abstract artist who aimed to reveal the inner stillness of things. "[Stillness] strikes...
Feb 19, 20202 min read
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Day 75
Precious people have been blown open like sacks, their brains and organs unseaming. The image hit me in the stomach as I walked past my...
Feb 18, 20202 min read
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Day 74
"I sing the body electric." These are the words of Walt Whitman, the poet to whom the body was not just bound by bones and sinews. “And...
Feb 18, 20202 min read
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Day 73
I was washing dishes, preparing my world for the sunrise. Everything becomes symbolic in winter, you see, as we plunge into the inner...
Feb 4, 20202 min read
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Day 72
Death is such a passing thing. It comes and goes like a cold, leaving germs of life in its wake. Something always remains. If not me, at...
Jan 31, 20201 min read
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Day 71
I see the light through the glass porch door as I drink lemon water and eat a thin slice of bread. I am "fasting" today, and this is my...
Jan 30, 20202 min read
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Ep. 15: The Trauma of the Image and the Aloneness of Authenticity
Only you can inhabit the life you were given. We use social signifiers so the world can see us, but the world can see only the image.
Jun 10, 20245 min read
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